Tuesday, September 11, 2007

The new THONGS are here! The new THONGS are here!

Hey you. Excuse me, yes, you, with the mighty fine ass.
I didn't think that thing could look any better, but you know what? Take a look at this.

I'm not just saying this. I think you are the perfect person to have one of these Simpson and Snatch thongs.

I'm just th---whassit? oh, you'll take one? That is pretty pretty awesome. Thanks, dude. It helps support our show! Thanks. The designs on all the stuff were made by our friend Tori LaConsay! You, uh---ehhh, nevermind.
--oh, it's nothing.
--it's just that---i was just thinking, well, you know about holidays, right?
know what those are? they're coming up so fast!!
and birthdays?
you've had them, you've known people who've turned older on a specific day, and expected something original from you, right?

well, why don't you give itunes and crate and barrel a day off.

get them something they won't expect, and possibly won't want--that is, until they realize the awesome powers* that come with owning and wearing a Simpson and Snatch thong. We'll put a business card in with the order, too, so whoever receives this craptastic awesomeness of an item will have the website, and become an avid fan of the houseboat on Lake Slampsberg. If you're local, just ask us and we'll do the transaction in person. saves a lot of hassle and paper. Let's leave those postal workers to chattering with their face holes in the back room at the p.o. shhh, now they're napping!

While you're on the merch page, toss a button or two on your order for maximum enjoyment.
They were made by our friend Becky Johnson of Iron Cobra in Toronto!
Yeah? Great! No.... you couldn't possibly...well, sure! One t-shirt coming up. Man, you are THE coolest. And I would've thought that if you'd just bought the one thong. Seriously.


*powers are decided by the wearer, and exist only in the supernatural realm of wearer's mind.



Blogger John J. said...


The shirt looks rather tempting.

...and maybe the thong... ;)

I'll see about using my powers of "The Whore" on BabyDeathTrap.com when I get home. :)

9:22 AM  
Blogger maryk said...

wait, what's that? "the whore"?

you mean a little cross-promotion? any bump you could give our page or merch page or both would be teh awesomest!!1

4:46 PM  
Blogger John J. said...

Me. I am "the whore."

I posted a little blurb on the BabyDeathTrap.com forums. I'll see about posting something frontpage. :)

11:07 PM  
Blogger Jerell said...

I wanna S&S mug!

12:12 PM  

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