Friday, December 02, 2005

Couldn't even buy a house in Marvin Gardens

Went to my credit union to deposit a check and withdraw some kay-ash, went to Whole Foods to spend more $ than is necessary, and POW! One of my Jacksons is a FAKE! Can you believe it? Can you? I couldn't. It looked really real.
Oh well, they give it back to me, and I give them another one.
Little did I understand the apparent luck I had just experienced with this transaction. Read 78 year-old Lucille Howard's story from Augusta! WTF?! (unfortunate bugmenot code: cunt88, licker)

This morning I went to the credit union again, told them what happened, the teller chick who I always go to sighs, looks worried, goes off to talk with her manager. She comes back, I'm waiting for an apology and another twenty.... "I'm sorry, Elena says there's nothing we can do about it."

Reeeeally. Well, Clark Howard's consumer help line says, well, yeah, that's technically pretty much the policy across the board with banks. They gave me a list of numbers to call and websites to visit, which I won't call or visit---not for $20, even though it's more about the principle of the thing and customer service issue that gets me.
They agreed with me, though, in that...I mean, what do you do? Carry a counterfeit detection marker with you and test every bill you get from the bank before you leave?
They suggested a note. So I wrote a letter to f-ing Elena McNash, branch manager, when I got home. I was too hopping mad to go talk to her at the time, and I would've ended up in a fist fight. I just know that feeling I get when I feel like the little guy (big girl) is being taken advantage of and ignored by big beaurocracy. Seriously. Makes me wanna punch at things. Things that look like Elena McNash's big head. The letter itself is fairly professional, it is not hostile. But here's the subtext:
"Give me my $20, you puffy-paint-sweater-wearing-B98.5-listening-fat-headed bitch, or I'LL take MY $400 ELSEwhere, thank-you-very-much!"

Can I borrow $20?


Blogger rp said...

I noticed that you included the branch manager's name, but not the name of your bank. You should edit your post to include the name of the bank manager, the name of the bank, the address of the bank, the phone number of the bank and any other pertinent information. You can also start a grassroots campaign, using your friends and blog-readers to assault said credit union with letters informing them that we will never use their services after hearing Mz Carrie Maft's horror story of counterfeited terror. That'll learn 'em.

3:52 AM  
Blogger ablebody said...

OH MAN! i'm livid and it didn't even happen to me.....yet. that's just the sort of thing that i'd get all puffed up over in public and get arrested for throwing 'bows (elbows) dripping with sarcasm.
as a side note, what exactly protects a bank from being prosecuted for passing counterfiet $$? another example of how corporations have more rights thank individuals.
eewooooo, that MAKES ME MAD....rab-bit.

2:42 PM  
Blogger Anne-Davnes said...

Jeeeezus mary, I'll say it again. I love theway you tell stories. And yes, that's ridiculous. If the bank accepted a bad bill and then GAVE it to you - then why is it your mistake? They should fucking know, right?? And i agree with RP, spread the werd.

peter once tried to pay for something with those fake "credit cards" that come with new wallets. All white with big black letters that read at the top C R E D I T C A R D. HIlarious. I watched him do it and almost wet my pants watching the clerk blink. And blink. And blink.

4:45 PM  
Anonymous Skip Huffman said...

Put it on ebay. With the story. Some fool will buy it for $100.

9:53 AM  
Blogger maryk said...

My letter's in the mail.
Reason I didn't list Powerco Federal Credit Union's name is that it's for employees of Southern Company (Ga. Power, Savannah Electric, etc) and their families. Not too much chance anyone else on here is even eligible. Their size and exclusivity could be a reason that they feel they COULD fuck me over, when it should've been the reason they gave me my $20 back. Customer service. I tried to make that clear to fat-head in the letter....

10:08 AM  
Blogger maryk said...

Skip, here's the best part, they kept it!

10:09 AM  
Anonymous Skip Huffman said...

They kept the counterfeit without reimbusing you? Now that is cold!

11:33 AM  

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