Wednesday, March 08, 2006

Unleash your inner pole dancer

...by using ebay.
" Pole-dancing can be a glamorous occupation, and more and more of us are looking to do it, attracted maybe by the appeal of high earnings and being woo-ed with Porsches and luxury holidays !?! Not many make it this far though - NOT because they aren't pole-dancer material (it's easier than you think!), but because the path into this industry is difficult and there's no decent info available easily on hand. (It's not like you can ask for careers advice on how to become a pole-dancer! x.)

...Until now!...."

You will learn about:
"
  • What you need most of all (low self-esteem)
  • Doing a pole dancing class
  • Buying your own pole (brand names and generics: what you don't know could KILL YOU)
  • Auditions: tips and preparation (shave, wax, repeat)
  • Cosmetics and grooming (wax, wax, lipstick, shave, oh i better wax one more time)
  • Sample pole tricks and poses (my favorite is the "screaming catfish")
  • What to wear (thong? check. heels? check.)
  • Essential Club etiquette (always use anti-bacterial on your pole after use. Be considerate)
  • Exercises (picking up grapes, the hard way)
  • 3 Comments:

    Blogger Machinistscott said...

    I’m going to invent a product, don’t tell anyone.

    Its going to be multiple layers of clear film that can be applied to the pole.
    These can be torn away one at a time by each strip………..er..a..dancer.
    I didn’t even think of the possibility of these being sold to the loser………..I mean paying customers.

    Anybody got any contacts at 3M?

    10:56 PM  
    Blogger A said...

    There are women all over Oklahoma, Texas and Florida buying this manual...I can just feel it. Blows my mind!

    11:08 AM  
    Blogger Galbinus_Caeli said...

    Not making enough money at the Cartoon Voice thing?

    12:23 PM  

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