Monday, November 21, 2005

Hmmmmmm.

"I'm not greedy. I have love, blue skies, rainbows and Hallmark cards, and that has to be enough. It has to be enough, but it's everything in the world and everything in the world is plenty for me. It seems just rude to beg the invisible for more."

click the pic

UPDATE:
Weird. Now they have this picture on the same article. It's like they wanted a rougher, more evil photo to accompany the article. I personally think it works MUCH better to put the sweet smiley one to contrast with the material. Not that the material is evil, but that's what most people think that kind of talk is. EVIL. But, get this, what is EVIL spelled backwards, huh? Huh? Seriously, I wanna know, I'm reverse dyslexic.
dordiky, dollelkdlkmjdklskjdjfkkjf.
~mk

Saturday, November 19, 2005

I did not know that

If you hold the "CTRL" button down while you roll the mouse wheel up or down, the text gets bigger or smaller.

Go ahead. Try it. Right now.

Again, I did not know that.

More importantly, how could I have never heard of that?

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

The Good News?

There is no bad news.
Not today.
It's cloudy out, but it's chilly and crisp.
It feels like Thanksgiving.
Well, it feels like a TV Thanksgiving.

Monday, November 14, 2005

The bad news?

There is no good news.

Jeeeezus. I mean, come ON.
So, Leslie recently made some throw-away remark about how we should all invest in Morningstar Farms. I can't even remember why she said it. But it's something I've thought about before, to some degree. I do feel that vegetarian-type foods/products and organic stuff is a growing market, and it's only going to get bigger. The more bad news there is about mad cow and avian bird flu, the more my belief is affirmed. The earth just won't be able to sustain the current rate of animal production/destruction. Yeah, you just go ahead and ask me to site resources that support that statement. I mean, no. No, please don't ask me for resources to support that statement.

I've felt like a hypocrite:
1) because I have been, am, and would be in commercials for products that I whole-heartedly don't believe in. I do have a problem with this, and have always gotten by it by telling myself it's a means to an end. And then, later, when I am successful enough, I'll use their money to donate to causes opposed to the commercial ventures. Like Moby! But I'm just fooling myself.
2) because I have mutual funds that include some very bad companies. Very bad. I tried looking up some stuff up on some of the "good" companies, and this is the first site I came to:
http://www.corporganics.org/
It's chock-ful-o-links. So there, there's your references and resources. It is seriously depressing.

Almost any brand of "organic" and/or vegetarian food or product that you recognize from the grocery shelves has a family tree with a giant asshole hanging off the top branch. What-- I mean, what?!in the hell are we supposed to buy?

Way,
way,
way
down the page (which I almost didn't get to because I was so depressed and overwhelmed) is a title:

THE GOOD NEWS

There is some after all!
It's full of if's and but's, ...but it's better than no good news at all. There are still some companies that aren't sold out. So I clicked on the link to "There are healthy and tasty alternatives in all of these food categories, owned by companies which are locally/regionally- and/or family-owned."
.
.
.

Not Found

The requested URL /goodfood.html was not found on this server.
As Rosco P. Coltrane said, "Good news! Good news. Geeuk, geeuk, geeuk!"

Krystal, wit cheese: or "Get yer hands off my hinterlands."

Finally got to see/hear one of the Squidbillies episodes I'm on. Actually, I was two characters. I'd forgotten about a certain ...uh, urban stand-up comedian bit. "Krystal's" watching a comedian on tv, lying on her mattress at the dump. While I was in for the "Krystal" recording session, I saw the stand-up routine bit written there, and just started doing sort of a Wanda Sykes rip-off. And they wanted to keep it. Thing is, I could do SUCH a better job of it, but I just couldn't work it up there, in the booth, on the spot. I was disappointed in myself---I've been honing that since 4th grade when I found myself in a kind of crappy public school in Savannah after years in practically all-white private schools. I sort of had to use my chameleon characteristics to adapt. I quickly found that the people I wanted to be friends with were Yolanda (funny and ka-razy), Iris (tiny!), Enrique (this guy was seriously hilarious, he had this mature, deadpan, almost comedian-esque delivery of the most mundane things), Kenya(sweet, sweet-and smart), Danise(beautiful) and Vicky (my best friend, and not-white, though I've never again run into another black Vicky). They were the kids that were nice to me, asked me to sit with them in class and at lunch. Wow. It wasn't that easy at the private school. So little by little I'd pick up colorful phrases and use them at home and church and frighten my family. The frightening hasn't stopped to this day. I prefer it that way.

But, in my defense, it was about at least as good as most of the Boondocks voices. Is it just me? Or do a lot of THOSE voices sound put-on? And forced? And I know it's not some "chalky" (as white people are referred to on Squidbillies) from Savannah voicing them. I watched it for the first time last night, and admittedly, I laughed a couple times---usually it was at something said or yelled by someone off-screen. And Adam West's randomness was pretty funny. But a lot of the voices sounded ...just forced. Unnatural in dialogue. And so many characters are so angry. I guess maybe this is part of the intent, or carried over from the comic strip? But it makes, for me, a less-enjoyable viewing/listening experience. There are other ways to get across anger and injustice.
Maybe it's the one-liner feel to a lot of the dialogue. I don't know. ....I'm starting to feel uncomfortable....

Anyway, so I was suprised last night to hear that they actually did use my stand-up voice for Sqidbillies. I'm not sure what the episode was called, the ones on the adult swim website are different from the ones on the cable info guide. Chalky Trouble or Family Trouble. I think they both have Krystal in them.

Weeeeeeeeee.
Hmmm. Maybe blogs really are self-indulgent. This sure reads that way.

Sunday, November 13, 2005

Post Secret

I assume most people know what Post Secret is. But for those who don't, it's a blog, and they post postcards that people send in-- mostly home-made, some very artistic/creative, and all are intensely...personal-- which share an anonymous secret.

It's amazing how many horrifying ones there are on some of the same topics. Yikes. They update the site every Sunday. One that sticks out in my mind is a postcard with a group of schoolchildren standing in a line in front of a chalkboard in a classroom with their faces blacked out, and written over the photo was something to the effect of, "I kept a student back a grade so I could flirt with his father for another year." Shazoooee.
There are no archives, so I can't re-post it here.

This one from the current posting is particularly horrifying to me:











Wow.
Then there's this one:
(whatcha call one of those subtle warning flags being tossed out)

Thursday, November 10, 2005

Crude Plan for Alaska's Texas Tea Bagged

House suspends Alaska drilling push
"Twenty-five Republicans, led by Rep. Charles Bass of New Hampshire, signed a letter asking GOP leaders to strike the Alaskan drilling provision from the broader $54 billion budget cut bill...."

But don't go thinking it's because all those republicans have had some change of heart or see the absurdity in it. It's "because Democrats oppose the overall budget bill, giving House GOP opponents of drilling in the Arctic enough leverage to have the matter killed."

But, whatever, I'll take it!
My brother tried to defend the whole business and perhaps sway my mind by suggesting I read this:
http://www.nationalreview.com/flashback/goldberg200503180758.asp

Nice try, Rush, Jr.
The crux of the argument seems to be that the area set aside for drilling is not "pristine" --like this--
as the knee-jerks and environmentalists claim, but rather ugly, barren, and covered with puddles--like this---->
and infested with mosquitoes. Soooooo, it's ok to drill then. Because it's ugly.
All the bro got from me after that was a loooong email about how the whole article was WRONG. And beside the point. Ridiculous.
One especially hilarious point this guy tries to make is that at Prudhoe Bay in Alaska, the areas around the oil installations and pipelines there, the Central Arctic caribou herd enjoys the shade provided by the pipelines there in the summer and cozy up to it for warmth in the winter. Awwww.

And who'da thunk little moustachioed Steve "rEAR entry" Brodie woulda gotten this nEAR to beating Anne "the Beaver Buster" Fauver!? It's not clEAR, yet, who the decisive winner is, and my fEARS may still be realized. But the heat is on, it's down to the provisional ballots, and litEARally it's coming down to several votes! I may just get un-disillusioned because of this election.
And it just may be a decent year for the environment, yet!


.... Those are some ears, my friend.

Saturday, November 05, 2005

The Cap'n was here!

Today's top news stories are seeming funny to me, when in fact, they are rather serious.

1.
First of all, there's the inmate on a Texas death row for murder charges who somehow slipped out of handcuffs, put on his clothes from his court appearance, showed guards state employee identification, made his way to the LOBBY, and walked out of the prison's doors like a regular joe. The police are saying the cause is 100% human error.









2.
Secondly, a cruise ship off the coast of Somalia was attacked by ......pirates! I love it! The ship's Cap'n apparently thwarted the attack. HOW?! How do you train someone for that? DO they train for that? I think part of the reason I think this story's kinda funny is that I was just watching Johnny Depp the other night in Pirates of the Caribbean. Now that's a fun pirate! I'd go so far as to say, that Jack Sparrow's one pirate we can all get behind. Literally. What? One site says, "Pirates have launched 23 attacks against ships off anarchic Somalia since March 15..." Wow. Cnn's pirate story reported "The cruise ship eventually outran the pirates' boats...." and that only one person had minor injuries.

See, just harmless news, it's okay to laugh. Nobody got hurt. Wait. Well....

But you know they're gonna catch that guy. And we all know what Texas likes to do. And it's not what Las Vegas likes to do. Well, it's kinda like that, but just with electricity and it's not just your thumb. So it's kinda the same thing. Again, America shines in the eyes of the world.

Friday, November 04, 2005

point and click flash game

Got this from Skip who got it from Mike, who says that all the objects are from photos the game designer took of objects and trees around Prague.

"This is a point and click flash puzzle adventure from a local Czech artist. It's
pretty dang cool!

SAMOROST

Loosely translated, the tilte means "gnarled""

On my computer it ran kinda slow. But I was intrigued. You click on certain objects to cause actions which forward the puzzle/game.

Wednesday, November 02, 2005

Christmas present idea

Here's what I think would be a good Christmas present idea. And I know how you all beg to hear what I think about EVERYthing. Enough, alrehehehady heh heh ha heh ohhhh. It's Francis Ford Coppola's Zoetrope: All Story.
If you know people who like to read short stories and look at pictures and don't like ads and don't have a lot of money, then this is what you want. to give them. Or if that person is you, then this is what you want. to give yourself.
If... then.... That's always been a very satisfying pairing (no, that doesn't sound right...) or whatever that is. If you know what that's called, then let me know.
Found this. Conditional propositions, I guess they're called. School was a long time ago. But I likes ta read the picture books! If...then...else...BOOLEAN!

I tried to look up and figure out exactly what an actual zoetrope is, and my eyes started to burn.

So, anyway, the stories aren't all winners, but they're all very different and very interesting for the most part. If I hadn't cancelled my gym membership, this is what I'd be reading at the gym on the thingee with the wheels that you do the thing on. I'd even conditioned myself to the point where I'd look at the issue on the coffee table, and think, well, I'll just go to the gym so I can read it.

Now I enjoy it with Snickers and burritos.


They also have two anthologies (for only $12.00 each!) that "include some of the best short stories to have appeared in Zoetrope: All-Story, new fiction commissioned exclusively for these volumes, and original essays on film." I have the one from 2000, but want to get the newer 2003 issue.

Why am I pushing so hard for you to order this??

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Evite more fun than actual party for many.

What happens to people between their initial uncontainable excitement at being evited to a party and the actual party.
I find that sometimes the same people that use upwards of 8 exclamation points to express their excitement about a gathering can more often than not be found sipping on some drink, standing next to some chips that are on some table, looking around like they're ready to leave.
Who extenguished that FIRE (FIY'uhhhh) fueled by puns and inappropriate innuendo and ebonics?
Who??!
Because, this pizzarty wants to knizzow!!!!!!!!....!!!!!

Y-ikes!

"Go your way, with P-Mate."

"THE PERFECT GIFT FOR WOMEN IN THE MILITARY!
GREAT STOCKING STUFFERS TOO!"

I'd give credit to the person who sent this to me, but I'm not sure they want it.

There are so many things to say, yet..... I'm just not sure I want to say them. There I go censoring on my own little blog thingee.

Well, here's a picture that'll speak for some of the things I was gonna say. In fact, any pics on this site will do the trick.


Click on the girl with her hands in her pants to see some very real and awesomely weird pictures. For some reason I'm hot and hungry. Explain that to me.