Hey you. Excuse me, yes, you, with the mighty fine ass.
I didn't think that thing could look any better, but you know what? Take a look at this.
I'm not just saying this. I think you are the perfect person to have one of these Simpson and Snatch thongs.
I'm just th---whassit? oh, you'll take one? That is pretty pretty awesome. Thanks, dude. It helps support our show! Thanks. The designs on all the stuff were made by our friend Tori LaConsay! You, uh---ehhh, nevermind.
--oh, it's nothing.
--it's just that---i was just thinking, well, you know about holidays, right?
know what those are? they're coming up so fast!!
you've had them, you've known people who've turned older on a specific day, and expected something original from you, right?
well, why don't you give itunes and crate and barrel a day off.
get them something they won't expect, and possibly won't want--that is, until they realize the awesome powers* that come with owning and wearing a Simpson and Snatch thong. We'll put a business card in with the order, too, so whoever receives this craptastic awesomeness of an item will have the website
, and become an avid fan of the houseboat on Lake Slampsberg. If you're local, just ask us and we'll do the transaction in person. saves a lot of hassle and paper. Let's leave those postal workers to chattering with their face holes in the back room at the p.o. shhh, now they're napping!
While you're on the merch page
, toss a button or two on your order for maximum enjoyment.
They were made by our friend Becky Johnson of Iron Cobra in Toronto!
Yeah? Great! No.... you couldn't possibly...well, sure! One t-shirt coming up. Man, you are THE coolest. And I would've thought that if you'd just bought the one thong. Seriously.
*powers are decided by the wearer, and exist only in the supernatural realm of wearer's mind.
**SERIOUSLY! WINK! BUY! please?