Squidbillies

Since I couldn't (didn't) go to my film's premiere in Austin, I decided to go to the premiere for the new Adult Swim series, Squidbillies, and celebrate enough for both projects. Wow. I just kept thinking, well, if Shallow-Pockets-Turner is gonna spring for an open bar, I'm not gonna insult anyone by not trying to drink all of the beer in the place.
That's just the kind of girl I am. I was raised with that kind of integrity. I'd go so far as to say steely integrity.
Or maybe steely liver, full of integrity, and by integrity, I mean beer..
Or it was a steely liver. Again, wow.

Dan ended up not being able to go, so I went by myself, and luckily Clunky and his lady were there, then in walked c-dub, then Dana S.(the girl) so I was set--that would've been a fine enough party even without the for-the-most-part-too-cool-to-talk-to-you Cartoon Network Adult Swim crowd. Man, I forget how "uncool" I am until I'm placed up against the "cool" crowd. Maybe many of them were uncomfortable because it was a work party? But I got the cold shoulder a few times until whoever I was with said, "Mary is in Squidbillies and Raydon." "Ohhhhhhh" and suddenly I was worth talking to for a couple minutes. Not everyone is like this, but more than there should be.

I watched the ass-kissing, too. There was a lot of ass-kissing. Dave and Matt of Aqua Teen were constantly getting their asses kissed. And poor Dana Snyder (the guy), who plays Master Shake. I never saw him without several kids hanging on him. But he's really good like that. He enjoys it, I think, and is very gracious and always friendly. Always. And he's a huge Ted Knight fan, which automatically makes him ok in my book.


They screened "Raydon!" which is a short script (actually shot on film) that Dave and Matt have had around for years. I remember reading it like 5 or so years ago. Turner finally told them they'd pay to shoot it if they'd put it on the next ATHF dvd. Of course they would. I play Dave's wife, and we have a raydon leak in our new house. Casey Willis is hilarious as Dr. Chen who comes to diagnose the problem. Matt and Dave are really funny, too. Matt's great on camera, very subtle. I am not.

The Squidbillies show was the 2nd of 6 episodes, and it was one that I was not in at all. Apparently last week's show I was in briefly, maybe one line, and then I was in a live-action info-mercial type thing about some baby product. We shot that at Williams St. and we actually used Dave's baby, Max---he really is a cute damn baby.

My character in the other episodes, Krystal, is a horrendous 500 lb. woman (not squid) with a mullet and racing stripes shaved into the side of her head who lives at the dump on an old used mattress and drinks soda from a giant "sippy cup" all day long. It's sort of like "Snatch" but maybe after a stroke. I wish I had a picture of the character to put here, it's disgusting. I had a great time doing the voice, and it makes me feel very good that those guys like the character. Dana (the guy) said it's like they brought a drunk street person in and put her in front of the microphone.

I've never felt like they really think I'm all that funny, just that I'm a reasonably funny person who happens to be a girl, who happens to not be very girl-y and they admittedly don't know many girls, which makes my worth go up. So, anyway, that makes me feel good. I also feel pretty good about them saying that the next season they'd like to use me in a lot of episodes. I hope that wasn't just the free booze talking, and that Turner keeps digging deeper in those pockets.

I got a haircut. Bad. ly.

Bangs! It seemed like a good idea. I wanted a change, and well, I got it.
Comments I've received:
"well, look at you!"
"do you like it?"
"Nice bangs"
"fantastic [sam's] haircut"
"you look like a mom"
"you look 12 years old," followed by:
"but it's good to shake things up"
"you look like Julia Roberts..." "Well, that's not ---" "...as Tinkerbell."
2 x "where's Mary Kraft?!"
and from a lesbian, "you look gorgeous."



Additions:
"she's a handsome woman."
"it's ...fetching"
"you've done something with your hair."

I used two pictures from a magazine (the one above is not one of them) to show the girl who cut my hair what I was looking for, and said "Anything in this arena, and I'll be happy." I lied.
Even she said as she handed me the mirror, swiveled the chair around and made a squinty-eyed-is-that-ok? look, "It'll take some getting used to." I told her yes, indeed, especially since I haven't had bangs since 1983.

her: "THAT was the year I was BORN!"

Bitch.

"Bluuuurb!" - SSS gets first review

It's short, but it's good. The press must've had an advanced screening, b/c the "premiere" isn't til Friday night.

Stomp! Shout! Scream!
W-D: Jay Edwards; with Claire Bronson, Mary Kraft, Cynthia Evans, Jonathan Green

Edwards' loving homage to the short-lived beach-party-by-way-of- horror-film genre of the mid-Sixties does it better than American International Pictures ever did, with canny nods along the way to Them, Jaws, The Horror of Party Beach, and Roger Corman's own B-movie
update Humanoids From the Deep. The arrival of an all-girl garage rock band in the quaint seaside community of Merriville Island coincides with a sudden rash of sandy mayhem that may be the result of the dreaded skunk-ape, which leaves behind a hideous odor to match its rampant carnage. On the trail of the beast are a trio of semicompetent cops ("It just don't make no sense – what kind of a homicidal maniac would do something like this?") and the requisite smart guy from the local college, who's final utterances remind us to forget about the skies, already, what we really need to be watching are the tides. It's nearly as much fun as an episode of Hullabaloo, snappy bouffants, earnest braniacs, hippy-hippy-shake, and all.

– Marc Savlov

When I opened the email, I had my fists clenched, jaws set, waiting to read something more like, "While Mary Kraft does seem comfortable with the electric bass in her hands, her character doesn't seem to know what she's doing when not on stage. If intentional, this choice could have been used to great effect in the story, however, I do not believe Ms. Kraft was self-aware enough to notice this or anything for that matter...."

Click on the picture to the right to go to the teaser trailer.

This made me laugh

From Doug Benson's "i love movies!"

CAPOTE : I predict this movie's theatrical run will be just like Truman Capote in real life. Short, and full of dicks.

Stomping. Shouting? Screaming!

The feature-length film I shot one year ago, Stomp! Shout! Scream!, will have its world premiere on October 21, 2005 as part of the Austin Film Festival and Screenwriters Conference. Exciting! The guy who wrote and directed it is editor and producer for Aqua Teen Hunger Force. It's been described as a "comedic head-on collision between '60s beach party teen flicks and a good old-fashioned monster. Add a retro soundtrack and you've got the makings of a cult classic." (from filmforce.ign.com)

For the interested among you 4 or 5 people out there reading this, he has an online journal documenting the process from beginning to end, well, beginning to current. Several people, myself included, submitted journal entries. There are lots of pictures, which are fun and easy to look at. He actually started the journaling at the request of filmforce.ign.com who posted the progress and updates on their site, as well. I'm not quite sure what the hell that filmforce site is all about. mc chris is interviewed on it, and it's a long damn interview.

I sure am link-happy. (You'd expect me to link something there, wouldn't you? For the joke. I'm not even trying anymore!)

Oh, doing that movie was so much fun. it was soooo nice if ONLY for being paid to go to Bradenton, FL for several days, dress up like a girl-band-girl and drink beer.
And Bradenton's some kindsa rich folk beach. Whew!

I need a haircut. Bad. ly.

I didn't realize how much I needed a haircut til it finally rained. Holy crap.

Here is a nice problem to have. I've been holding out on committing to a 4 day job til I hear about this 1 day job that would pay just about the same thing--which in the regular world is actually a lot of pay for a 4 day job and stupid for a one day job.
Found out today that I didn't get booked on the one day job which had as its only requirement that a woman pound on a piece of steak like she didn't think it would really accomplish anything.
And I didn't get that job.

So instead, for 4 days at the GWCC or some place similar, I'm going to be an upscale mom---I am neither upscale nor a mom. But it's work! And there are some fun people working the job with me. And I get to act like I have a regular real job, nice clothes and babies. What I love is that they actually go far enough into the back story of this character to say that her occupation is lobbyist for Glaxo-Smith-Kline in Washington, DC.---she has 2 kids and another on the way.....waaaait, do they think I look pregnant? Maybe my hair isn't my biggest appearance problem. Or maybe I AM PREGNANT?! Just WHO is resPONSIBLE for THIS?! I was taking my G-S-K pills... This isn't supposed to happen. Oh, well, that's life on the Big Pharma! Green acres and all. And besides, BABIES are ADORABLE! If you don't believe me, just go to a grocery store during the day during the week! JUST aDORable, I tell you! And don't you go and get me started on those precious moms....

They tell us a day before the audition in an email that we had to "make up a short improv" about this character using some bulleted points of info. Then we had to act like we were dodging things coming at us (which were to be ideas and information), then focus our attention on one of these that we WANTED, and-- in slow motion--grab "it," and make some sort of vocalization about finally finding what we're looking for. What I choose to do at this moment, with arm raised in gladiator-like triumph and slightly crossed eyes, sounded something like---WeeaaaaaHOOOOOOOO! THIS job I GET?!?

It's all HOOEY I tell you. HOOEY.

*note* In looking for a link between birth control and Glaxo Smith Kline, I ran across this site---it's interesting because the first sentence to show up on the google search synopsis is, and I quote:
"By taking the birth control pill I have yet to injure my good knee, ..."
Reminds me of the Lewis Black bit about the horse comment he overheard in an IHOP:
"If it wasn't for the horse, I never would've gone to college."

Retail Logo Alphabet Game

Kinda fun. My friend Anne sent this to me. Most of the ones I knew were related to food.... I've figured out a few since this afternoon, just from noticing them while I was out and about today. Also kinda scary.

Click on the pic above to go to the logo alphabet quizzzzes. There are 4 of them. The most I got in one quiz was 15. Most disturbing is that you can get the answers to the first 3 editions, but he's started CHARGING like $4 on Pay Pal to get hints and answers to the last one. What a douche!

*UPDATE*: Someone has posted some answers to the 4th edition online at http://www.iamnafets.com/?page=rag

Look what I found online

I'm going to a print "go see" today--I'll just show up and they'll take a few digital photos of me to see if I'm right for a print ad of some sort. I don't even know what it's for. Should I care?

Anyway, I went to the photographer's studio website to get directions, and found this!


haw haw haw.

The Woggles

I think I'm going to go see The Woggles on Tuesday night at The Earl.

Not to be confused with The Wiggles.




I didn't know Adam Corolla was on a childrens' show, too.



Anyway, The Woggles, not the Wiggles, are playing with a band from Detroit called The Electric Six who I know nothing about, but a guy in the film community here in Atlanta says they're friends of his from Michigan.

Just, FYI.

Dream Themes -- Mean Sometheeeng?

A recurring theme in my dreams is tornados. That's not a good one, as themes go.
I even dreamt once that my ex-boyfriend's family lived in my home in Savannah, they were my family, and a tornado was outside. I told them to get in the closet with me, and the only one that listened was his (my) father. We knelt in the closet til it passed, and when we climbed out, nobody was around, but there was a framed picture of them and the glass was broken over everyone's face but his, which in the dream signified that he was the only one that survived. ....Now maybe they'll listen to me! **Edit:** I almost forgot the best/worst/weirdest part! About a week and a half later, their whole neighborhood in Dunwoody was sort of wiped out by that storm that blew through there. The meteorawwlorologists were hesitant to ever say there were tornadoes. I think they settled on straight-line winds. Well, whatever the f#%$ they were, they picked trees up out of the ground and threw them across the TOP of the house and into the neighbor's back yard. You could trace the trajectory. So many pine trees just snapped off and tossed several lawns away. One rather large tree fell onto my ex's family's roof, smashing it in. But they were relatively lucky, especially since they were IN the house, hiding in the basement. The dad must've told them about my good idea.



My most recurring dream theme is skiing. That's a really good one--even though most of the time in these dreams I'm trying, trying to get onto the mountain before the lifts close, or before the snow melts, and often don't ever make it.
But the times I do get up there, it is as good or better than the actual thing.
Usually I'm a better skier, asleep, too.

There are times that I'm driving on a hilly road and I imagine I'm skiing.
Damn. I love skiing.
I lived in Steamboat Springs, CO (picture above) for 2 winters in the early 90's. To even think about it now is like remembering a really good dream. Only pieces come back, really, and they don't tell the whole story, but a complete mental image is formed, my mood is changed, and that's good enough for me.
It's just so damn expensive. That's why I rarely get back there. Maybe that's why I rarely get there in my dreams.
But my best friend, Leslie, saw some pictures of me from my last ski trip this past January to Copper Mountain, CO and made the comment that I looked happy. "I never see you smile like that here."
That really stumped me for a while.
I didn't believe her.
But it's pretty much true.
And that's not great.
I'm not UN-happy here. I love my boyfriend. And my friends. And it's nice to have my dad so close. But....

No wonder I love skiing. It makes me happy. I thought I just loved the skiing. I love the being happy just as much.