Hope

... for a Golden Summer.
They have a really weird, eery, unique sound. They're out of Athens, and play here from time to time--I've seen them at Cameli's the veg. restaurant, and at The Earl. They're playing this Thursday at New Street Gallery in Decatur, and lead singer Claire Campbell will be singing solo with...out "Hope," but with some others at Eddie's Attic in Decatur on Friday night.

You can listen to some music on their site, though it doesn't do them justice. I find that live, they're so much better--even though I've now bought 2 of their cd's, one which I just pre-ordered today. They have unconventional instruments like an accordian, banjo, clarinet, xylophone, a standup bass, the occasional slide whistle (which we all know I freakin love) and Claire plays a saw during some songs. She and her sister, Page, do most of the singing, and their voices together are really ....just weird and haunting and goose-bump-producing. Eery harmonies. Meet the band here.

Not to mention they're all SUPER cool, super nice--I even used (with permission, of course) parts of their song "Home is the Place" in the Dailies film "She's Leaving Home" for the Sgt. Pepper Project. Man, it sticks with you.

So, there you go.

Channel 101

Check out the new Channel 101 prime time shows.
Especially the Yacht Rock episodes, about smooth rock, specifically Kenny Loggins and Michael McDonald.

Why aren't we writing and shooting stuff for these? Seriously.

Dear Diary,

Silly me!
I didn't notice that the cough stuff was codeine til AFTER i took it.
...Thank GOD I didn't take it before the show!
I was ever so f-ed up last night, trying to fall into a spinning, slightly hallucinogenic sleep.
Talking. Was there talking?
Must have been Dan.
No, he was at class.
Oh well.
Stumbling into the walls getting up to go to the bathroom sure was funny. feeling.

Can't wait to see what tonight brings!
Ever your's,

Mary Elizabeth

Dramatic Reenactment

This is really crappy recording of a reenactment of actual comments made by Dean Beacham--our LONG-time next-door neighbor in Savannah. This is just in passing to my father (Doby) on her way out for a walk. I walked up on this part of the conversation.
She's always been like a ray of sunshine peaking in through darkclouds. And that's pretty much her actual voice.



Audio upload via FreeFileUpload.net
Anybody know of a better way to upload audio?

PWYC Night

Actors' night or Pay What You Can Night for Get Downsized in the Dad's Garage Top Shelf Space tonight, Monday, February 27.

Dekalb Electronics Recycling Day

Man, look how scared that computer is. And the guy, well, he doesn't wanna do it, he just doesn't know any better. But you do!

March 4, 2006

Residents can once again keep
their old computers and cell
phones out of the landfill by
bringing them to DeKalb
County's Electronic Recycling
Event, Saturday, March 4, 2006 from
9AM – 1PM.
Keep DeKalb Beautiful and DeKalb
County Public Works

Department will staff two drop-off sites:
• Tom Scott Building parking lot on Memorial Drive
• Brook Run Park in Dunwoody
During the last electronic recycling event in October, DeKalb
residents brought in more than 58,870 pounds of electronic items,
including more than 400 monitors and 500 CPUs. What an excellent
beginning for our County.
Electronics account for 2 to 5% of the County's landfill volume. We
encourage you to help participate in our efforts in Keeping DeKalb
Beautiful!

EXAMPLES OF ELECTRONIC EQUIPMENT THAT WILL BE ACCEPTED:

• Computer Monitors • Computer CPUs
• Laptops • Disk Drives
• Floppy Drives • Test & Network Equipment
• Modems • Circuit Boards
• Typewriters • CD Roms
• Cables • 8 Tracks
• Mouse • Video Machines
• Stereos • VCRs
• Cell Phones • CB Radios
• Record Players • Scanners
• Speakers • Keyboards
• Can Openers • Camcorders
• Cameras • Toasters
• Televisions ($10.00 charge)

For more information on accepted items, please call
Keep Dekalb Beautiful at 404-371-2654.

Here's some more info on electronics recycling.

I called to make sure it wasn't ONLY for Dekalb residents, and
the gal said, actually, she didn't know. But she couldn't imagine
turning anyone away. So....

Experimental (f)art

You are kidding me. Nice last name, too.
" Joseph Pujol had the power of breathing in air by his anus, just as normal people breathe in by the mouth. Then by means of this body of air contained in his intestines, he could at will reproduce all sorts of sound. Additionally he was able to imitate the sounds of animals even the sound of birds."

This was near the turn of the century. And William James, wasting his time with Pragmatism..... pshhhht.


Actually, I got these William James links from Karaoke Follows who has a really interesting blurb on his blog (that sounds like it would hurt) about Hamas, Pragmatism, Poetry, and Anti-semitism. Thanks for the info B. B.

Waaaait a minute....

Ok, so I've found a flaw in the personality flaw map. They say: "By describing your failings from a fixed list of adjectives, then asking your friends and colleagues to describe you from the same list, a grid of perceived and unrecognised weaknesses can be explored."

Well, I don't consider some of those adjectives as failings, or weaknesses or flaws. Thus, I explore them by celebrating them. For instance, someone calling themselves "Poop" describes me as vulgar.
First, that's funny for what it is.
Second, sure! I'd have put vulgar down on my JOhari as a personality trait I know of and embrace. They just didn't offer it.

I am just destroyed to think that something as scientifically sound as a personality map designed in the 50's might not help me achieve enlightenment and full knowledge of self after all.

what do you think?

As I was just leaving a really extra stupid commercial audition, my train of thought went through a number of horrible tunnels. It finally came to a halt on "I really want to stop caring what other people think of me."

Now, just 20 minutes later, I'm posting my Johari window for all of you.

Johari Window is this

Maybe one of the first adjectives you should pick is flip-flop-y.

Or, for those of you "brave" enough, a Nohari window.

Wow.

A self-proclaimed personality flaw map!....Even worse!

Here's where you can pick me apart.

Scary thing is, I picked out my 6 perceived flaws a lot quicker than the regular old personality traits.

Well, gotta run to an audition where I'm playing a high-end car salesperson who talks with a headset and uses the word "terrific."
Who uses the word "terrific?"
Apparently a high-end car salesperson named...Darlene uses the word "terrific."

Mt. Everest

This guy has a lot of videos on his site.

Including this ridiculous thing that I freakin love, from Mr. Show.

Brokeback Flatpoint

Yes. Another Brokeback parody.
With Chuck Noblet and Geoffrey Jellineck from Strangers with Candy.

Don't let me be the last to know

I try. I do. But I'm always a little behind on this type of stuff. BUT, I know I'm not the only one, so I will be the second generation passer-onner of information like this. Pop culture-y stuff.
In the same vein of Clunky's post about the awesome Live-action Punch-Out, George F. and I listened to Group X a couple times on a car trip. And I found some Flash Animation videos people have put together of their songs/raps. This is the Mario Twins one. Not to be confused with this Group X.

So, apparently, March 4th they will have a dvd release show here in Atlanta at Under the Couch on the Ga Tech campus.

Did you know that?

...Do you care?

What the coook is Under the Couch?

I hear ya

Another good Post Secret:

Funniest thing never videoed

I've been having a little trouble with sneezing in the morning. scroll to Ayyy!
This morning, I sneezed while getting cat food from the pantry and slammed my head into the opened pantry door, spilling cat food all over the kitchen, securing a nice bump and a tiny splinter on my forehead.
I was laughing so hard I almost threw myself onto the ground for the quick follow-up sneeze that occurred.
I know what you're thinking, that sure sounds a lot like, "Oh, this? It's nothing. I just sneezed and tripped and fell down the stairs into Dan's fist and got this black eye."

But he was already gone to work. Would I be up at that ungodly hour? No.
And thank GOD, because he HATES sneezing...

Can't you totally see me spastically and accidentally throwing myself into a cabinet? Somehow, it just makes a whole lot of sense.

Ohhhh, that shit was funny. And if a camera was rolling, I could be a thousandaire!

And good thing I have these BANGS now....this one may bruise!

Dangit!

Okay people (Skip),
How does this work?
I mean, I realize that on any given page, (Spoiler alert! SPOILER ALERT!---sorry, I've always wanted to "say" that) whatever answer you come up with has the same symbol, but what's the math behind it?

Get Downsized

There we go...

The Top Shelf Series continues as Dad's Garage presents the Regional Premiers of Get Downsized! Join the insanity of this hilarious, scathing and completely non-verbal glimpse into passive-aggressive office politics. In a world where "communication" is king, words are for amateurs. After all, there are far more subversive ways to drive your co-workers insane.

Featuring: Scott Warren, Sloane Warren, Christian Danley, Josh Ford and Mary Kraft

So, not sure how "scathing" or "hilarious" this "insanity" is/will be, but it's different! And it seems to be funny, we really need an audience, more than just Tim giggling politely at this point. I don't blame him. He's seen it a million times.

Opening is this Friday, February 17th. It says Thursday sneak peek, but I've heard this will not be a paying audience show for anyone. So don't show up, goddamnit. Not on Thursday. But starting Friday, it's on.

Looks like we run Friday/Saturday through March 11, with a matinee on Feb. 26th, and an Industry Night/Pay What You Can show Monday, Feb. 27th.

No words. Just physical stuff. Bits, if you will.

1 hour long. Starting at 8:00. No intermission. Get in, get out, go out, hook up, go home, throw up, pass out, wake up, repeat.

Top Shelf space (in the back) of Dad's Garage Theatre.

Leah says...

Bill Maher to Bush: You govern like Billy Joel drives.
Never saw this. But I thought it was worth seeing. I don't know where to watch Bill Maher. Is he on HBO or something? Got it from Leah S's myspace.

Be Mine....Now.

xoxoxoxo

I believe Mr. Rogers said it best:
Would you be mine? Could you be mine? Won't you be...my luhhhvvvvvah.
All this talk of Valentine's and sex makes me think of babies.
BABIES!
And how babies are not really a good or positive thing by definition.
They are merely innocent by definition.
Right?
They represent, what? Hope and purity, but that’s merely a representation.
Symbolism, like a cross representing the crucifix.
I know, how can I jump from newborns to crucifixion in such a short, quick hop?
Because neither are sacred.
To me, at least.
Maybe I'm one of very few.
I don't know.
Pregnant women…. Are you handicapped?
No, you got fucked.
Big deal.
Let me park there.

Oh, and Happy Valentine's Day!!!
xoxoxoxo

Coming or Going?

You'd think mussels were currency with what they were charging. Jesus, you could buy a baby in some countries for what they wanted for a bowl of squid.
A white baby.

He went to the shitter, so I smoked a cigarette.
And in that brief lapse it all seemed possible.

But Juan Valdez always kicks Carlo Rossi to the curb, and this time he leaves the door cracked open on his way back in.
So a cold Doubting Thomas made himself skinny and warm and JUST crept inside.

Bluth Finale

Tonight, on Fox, last 4 episodes, 8-10pm.

Last Meal

Relevant? Not in the least.
Morbid? Terribly so.
Thinking about it? Yes, indeed.

Found these "statistics" on what inmates ask for as their last meal, you know--before--well -- you know.

Final Requests:
Prison officials try to meet last meal requests but are usually restricted by the contents of the prison fridge. Lawrence Buxton requested filet mignon before he was executed in 1991 for a robbery and murder in Houston. He was served a T-bone as the prison pantry did not stock the more expensive cut of meat but he apparently enjoyed it and sent his compliments to the chef.

Below are the most popular last meals requested during 2004 in the USA.

Mains
1) Fried Chicken and chips
2) Hamburgers/cheeseburgers and chips
3) Steak and chips
4) Pizza and chips

Dessert
1) Ice cream
2) Apple / Pecan pie
3) Chocolate cake
4) Cherry cheese cake

Drinks
1) Coke
2) Iced tea
3) Pepsi
4) Dr Pepper

1 person requested Baked Beans
1 person requested Dom Perignon

A Texas prisoner's final meal request included:
6 fried chicken breasts with ketchup, french fries, 6 layer lasagna (ground chicken, beef, cheese, minced tomatoes, noodles and sauteed onions), 6 egg rolls, shrimp fried rice and soy sauce, 6 chimichangas with melted cheese and salsa, 6 slices of turkey with liver and gizzard dressing, rice, cranberry sauce and six lemonades with extra sugar.

Would you want liver and gizzard dressing on turkey for your final meal? Thought not.
Tell them what you'd chose for your last meal.

And tell me in the comments section.
I'm still thinking. But I bet it involves lots of crab meat, lobster and scallops, wrapped in bacon-wrapped steak with french fries and onion rings. And a side of ranch. And blue cheese. And honey mustard. Yes, as a matter of fact I DO think this is a Ruby Tuesday's.

clunky casserole

Technology enthusiasts in the San Fran area meet up every month for Dorkbot, where recently the topic wasn't robots and shit like that, but food. Gourmet food. It seems some hackers are trying out "molecular gastronomy,"(bug me not: 999999999 for both) the guiding principle being "to create dishes based on the molecular compatibilities of foods. For instance, unripe mango and pine share a molecular structure, so they might be tasty if combined. That's the theory, anyway. Molecular gastronomists combine white chocolate and oysters for the same reason."

Recipe: Nitro Pumpkin Seed Pie Horchata Foam

• Blend 2 cups raw shelled pumpkin seeds (pepitos) and 4 cups water for 20 minutes or until the mixture has the consistency of the Mexican rice drink horchata. Strain and chill.

• Boil 2 cups water, 1 ceylon cinnamon stick (crushed), 1 vanilla pod, 2 allspice seeds (crushed), 1/2 thumb of grated ginger and 1/4 nutmeg seed (grated) for 20 minutes to infuse flavors. Strain water, add 2 cups sugar and bring mixture to boil again to dissolve sugar. Chill.

• Blend pepito seed "horchata" and syrup, adjusting flavoring as needed. Add 2 tsp soy lecithin or dried soy milk and disperse well.

• Load a one-quart nitrous oxide dispenser (typically an Isi whipped-cream canister with siphon) halfway with the "horchata" and syrup mix. Charge with three nitrous oxide canisters ("android turds") and chill.

• Over a liquid nitrogen bath, dispense some foam from the dispenser into a spoon. Drop the foam into the nitrogen bath and agitate with a spoon to make sure it doesn't stick to the bottom. Remove from the nitrogen bath when the foam is hard on the outside, and plate.

Alton Brown would be proud.
Good Eats?

James Frey's Latest Memoir

David Cross:
James Frey's memoir of happenings since the Oprah show, "Lesson Learned".

"I left the Harpo studios in Chicago in a state of shock. ...." (click to read more)

it ends:
"... After that he killed me.

More To Come Later,
Sincerely,
James Frey"

Ready, Kids?

I'm not sure you are.
And neither is this gay mountain lion.


Thanks to Fierce Rabbit for this one.

If you've ever been concerned that the U.S. Department of Homeland Security isn't doing or spending enough to protect the country's countless children, ease your mind--and I have your purse (inside joke from college that one person who reads this will get.)
Here is the answer!

A family of mountain lions and a hummingbird will teach your kids how to survive a terrorist attack.
You: What the f?
Me: Yes, they will!

It's Rex, the father (clearly gay): Did you know?
HE LOVES: Making friends! He talks to everyone he meets and loves to learn all about them.
He made a guitar out of a hollow tree!

Purrcilla, the mother (clearly high) : Did you know?

SHE LOVES: Drawing! She has passed on her love of drawing to her daughter. Purrcilla enjoys taking her box of pencils and paper outdoors to sketch scenes from nature.

HOBBY: She loves to dance* in the mornings to relax and start her day.

Rory (the, uh, daughter?), Did you know?
FAVORITE SUBJECTS: Science, art, and music. She loves to play the drums. (I have a pretty good feeling she also likes denim shorts, Portia di Rossi, and feels bad that Chastity Bono can't lose any weight on Celebrity Fit Club.)
HOBBY: Inventing things! Rory uses objects that she finds around the house to "improve" things like scooters, skates, and sleds! How ridiculous!

and Hector the Hummingbird (who has an owl friend with breasts. Go back up and look at the picture, again). Did you know?
Sometimes he flies so fast that his goggles fly off! ¡Cómo está retardado!

Logically, the illustrator--Betsy Baytos--is a dance historian. ...?
And she is currently producing a Documentary film about early music hall and eccentric, comedy dancing.
I know what you're thinking. FINally!...
She's a fool if she doesn't contact ablebody about that sideways reachy-kicky dance of his.


*wash a hydrocodone down with some black coffee.**


**bourbon

A guy rides up on a bike and says

"You don't happen to have a dollar?" Quite the salesman.

Me, acting like I'm just as broke, and pointing emphatically inside the gas station: "Nope, sorry, I just had to pay for my gas with a credit card."

"Oh................(circling)..................well, you got a boyfriend?".........(circling).........

"Yeeeeaaaah." That's me, sort of clucking my cheek, as though--iiiiif I didn't have a boyfriend, I just might be considering this.

......(circling)......"Is he black?".......

"No."

"Oh. Black is better" ........(circling)....

"Well, (chuckle) that's what I've heard." -----SHUT UP, Mary.

"You've heard that?" .......(circling).....

"Yeeeeaaaah."

"You ever been with a black man?" .......(circling).......

"Nope."

"No? Well, maybe someday." .......(circling).......

"Yeah, maybe someday." ---Shut up, Mary.

...(stop)...."Oh YEAH? Maybe someday? Maybe someday?"

"We---eeeeaaaayyyyaaooo."

"You have kids?"

"Nooooooooo. No. Noooo."

"Why not."

"I can't afford them?"

"Maybe someday?"

"Yeaaah, maybe someday."

"You from Georgia?"

"Savannah, originally." (Come the f- on! $14.00!!!)

"Savannah....it's beautiful there. I've been there."

"Yeah?" ($14.00!)

"Yeah. But you an Atlanta girl now, huh?" .....(pedals off)....

"Yeah. Have a good night."

"Yeah, you too."

Crank. Drive.

Buddy's.... (sigh.)

Strangers with Candy audio clips

You're WELcome.

"If wishes and buts were clusters of nuts we'd all have a bowl of granola."
I just sometimes wake up saying this. I don't know.

Stew the Meat Man, response from a customer after Stew asked him if he was thinking about buying some steaks:

Chuck Noblet

all of these are from www.jerriblank.com